60 Years of Breakfasting

5th May.

Four months ago I was back at my parents' house, visiting Ash Vale for a friend's birthday and catching up with my folks. I don't really see them often enough, so it is always lovely to be handed an opportunity to go back to Ash Vale on a plate.

On my plate during this particular visit was an incredible breakfast. Derek McIntosh, the person who is responsible for the quality of my jokes, wanted to make me a cooked breakfast to see how it would rank up against those that I had sampled for this blog. He is a keen cook and takes pride in his work. I remember one time where he was very upset when his spaghetti bolognaise, possibly his specialty, failed to win a bolognaise competition at a local pub, being beaten by an offering that was made without any degree of seriousness with some dubious ingredients thrown in. He makes a mighty fine bolognaise, and has inspired me to try and make bolognaise my signature dish also.

Now, if I was to rank my dad's breakfast creation it would inevitably receive a healthily high biased score. What can be more restorative and homely than a meal prepared by one of your parents at home, especially when they're good at cooking? As a result, I'm not going to be able to properly score the dish without it being tainted by nepotic bias. I can, however, briefly talk you through what would have been a delicious and invigorating meal even if it had been served to me on the hard shoulder of a motorway by Michael Gove.

The Derek Special

Veggie sausages, vegetarian bacon, fried egg, tomatoes, baked beans, mushrooms and homemade hash browns

All the correct items, in all the correct proportions. Dad had done his research and knew his target audience. There was a great range of textures and tastes on parade, with moisture levels varying around the plate. There was saltiness, sweetness, umami-ness, mouthfeel, tang, all of the words I use most weeks and need to find new words for, all of these at very positive levels. And look at how it looks on the plate! A veritable superabundance, a festival of food, a 70s party in a Belgian library. It had it all going on.

The main talking points here, away from generic thumbs-up statements, are the hash browns and the vegetarian bacon. The former were an absolute triumph, especially exciting given that they were Dad's first ever attempt at hash brown creation. I am a massive fan of the regular shop-bought HB, but there is something just wholly more wholesome about one crafted outside of a factory environment.  The latter followed the trend that had been set by previous vegetarian bacon experiences. I swear that at some point in my life I have eaten tasty veggie bacon. What has happened to it?! It must be out there somewhere. I aim to get to the bottom of this mystery by the end of the year.

I've definitely inherited a major part of my sense of humour from my Dad. That little Belgian library joke is straight out of his playbook. Hopefully flair in the kitchen is something that passes down through the generations as well. If so, I'm onto a winner (Mum is a dab hand as well). By the time I reach the tender age of 60 as they have this year, I could well be a breakfast making master, ready to get very upset if served some substandard scran at a greasy spoon.

NB - due to a mixture of wedding preparation, housemoving and general sloth, I have become very behind with this blog. I hope to get back up to speed by the end of this upcoming fortnight, ready to get back out in the field in October.